The Wrong Way

Everything goes the wrong way. EVERYTHING!


I am lost and I don't know what to do. I might fall into depression. Who knows.


One day, I will just disappear and leave everything behind me. One day. Thank you (all) very much for making me like this. I will APPRECIATE it.


Till then, you don't know where I will be.





Life is like a box of chocolates. You won't know what you get until you opened it.

My life? 

Disappointment

I know everyone has their own taste of disappointment. I felt so disappointed, yesterday. I couldn't cope with it and I cried it out badly. I cried and cried for more than 3 hours, in the bathroom, in my room, on the bed, till I slept off. The thought of going to die is so strong till I can't believe it. This is my first time ever feeling so depressed. I thought I had fall into depression.

When I was struggling thinking between surviving and dying in the midst of my tears, my mom came into my room. I was lucky, because I off the lights and pretend that I am sleeping. She came in and ask me what happen (she thought I was sick), I told her I have massive headache and I need to sleep early. She asked me to eat the medicine before going to sleep. I just simply said yes, and yes I don't really have headache and so I don't need to eat any medicine. But my crying gets louder, because I realized that there's someone out there who really concern about me. She seldom does that, maybe she really felt that there is something wrong with me because I went to bed so early without switching off my laptop which is still in the living room.

I continue to hide under my covers, because the tears, and mucus just couldn't stop. This time my mother came into the room again and pulled the cover. Luckily it was dark and she couldn't see my puffy eyes and did not recognized my sore voice. She gave me Paracetamol and walked out. I felt guilty, so I really went to the kitchen and took one Paracetamol, since I really have minor headache due to constant crying for the past few hours. 

I went back to hide under my cover, switch on my phone and found out nothing incoming. So, that's it. The disappointment accompany my sleep, till the next morning. 

p/s: What makes me feel disappointed? Many, many, many things which I couldn't find anyone to share with.

p/p/s: I woke up with a very very serious puffy eyes this morning, and lucky my mother did not asked anything about it.

October Filler

Wow! It's been 2 months since my last post. That is why I am doing a filler post now. Since I don't know what to write, so I am posting some pictures to reflect what I had done for the past few months *digs out pictures*

 Kylie's Convocation

Went to find Dear during National Day

*wink* *wink*

 

Karen's Wedding during Hari Raya *the Lengluis*

My family with Karen, Chee Seng and Grandma

Genting trip with Dear on October 

 

Okay that's all! Will blog in details about all the events if I have the time :P

xoxo,

esineDenise <3